Progressing at my own rate

There are always other people on the promenade. Some walk, some run, some push prams or wheelchairs, some sit on benches, some visit with friends or read – there are many kinds of activities happening there. The people are all there for different reasons, such as enjoyment, exercise, fresh air, to see the views, to spend time with family, to lose weight, to get fit, to train for a race, to be with a friend, and so on.

Those who are doing the same thing may have different styles, eg those who are running run at different speeds, wearing different types of shoes or are barefoot, and they run in different styles, some barely lifting their feet, and others lifting them high. No runner stops another runner to comment on their speed or style or shoes. No one says, “Run faster”, or “Don’t walk so slowly”. Some are handicapped, but no one criticises them. The people are all different ages. They are all moving along the promenade but not all in the same direction. Some are setting out while others are returning. I walk. Some walkers who pass me are substantially older than I am. There are babies in prams (strollers), and the elderly and handicapped in wheelchairs. They need someone to push them. Everyone is moving at their own speed and in their own style.

 As I thought about this, I wondered why people in families and wards, or friends, criticise and judge each other. Why do they want to correct others, condemn them, or remove the mote from their eyes? We are all moving, living and progressing in our own way and at our own pace. We shouldn’t criticise the way others do or don’t live the gospel. For example, we may think things like – he doesn’t keep the Sabbath holy because he goes to the shops on a Sunday, she dresses immodestly, he is a poor teacher, he doesn’t do his home teaching regularly, she doesn’t attend Relief Society, and many other critical thoughts. Just as the walkers and runners are tolerant of each other, so should we be as we each make our way along life’s path in our own way.

The toy in my hand

As I push Matthew in his pram, I try to get him to look at the beautiful sea, the waves, the spray of the waves crashing against the promenade’s edge, the dolphins when we see them, but he is usually so focused on his book or toy that he may only glance up and not look long enough to see the spray. In fact, most times he misses the things I point out to him because he won’t look long enough. He doesn’t have the attention span nor the patience. If I see dolphins, he won’t watch the spot long enough for them to resurface. I have to keep staring at & around the spot where they are in order to see them.

We too shouldn’t be so focused on material things, acquisitions and things of little value, like Matthew’s toy in his hand, that we miss the beauties of life, and of nature. President Packer said that spiritual experiences can’t be forced. Staring at the sea and willing the dolphins to appear won’t make it happen. We have to be patient and keep watching and waiting for the Spirit to speak to us, or for answers to prayers. If we look away, or are inattentive, if we immerse ourselves in worldly things, we will miss spiritual wonders that may be there, but we aren’t paying attention.

Look up

On the one side of the Sea Point swimming pool is a lovely little playpark which is entirely enclosed. It is built right on the edge of the sea but high above it, and there is a very high fence on the wall, keeping everyone safely inside. I like to go there in winter because it is warm. I always sit on the bench closest to the sea and keep one eye on my grandson and one eye on the sea.

                                                           (This is not my grandson.)

 One day when we were there, there were lots of other children. Each had at least one adult with them, so there were about 30 or more people in this little park. After a while I noticed a whale. It wasn’t swimming past, but was taking a rest directly in front of me, and was blowing water out of his spout. I was very excited and looked towards all the people to see who else had seen the whale, expecting them all to be excited too. I was very surprised that not one of them had seen it. Each adult was so concerned with their own child that none of them looked up. None of them looked out to sea. Each was so involved in their own little world around them that they were unaware of what was going on not too far away.

I would encourage everyone to look beyond your own world or area of concern, and see the beauties of life. Take the long view. Have an eternal perspective. Look up. Look out. Look afar. If we get bogged down in our own little world, which may seem like the only world there is, if we are so concerned about our own cares and worries, and our own problems, we will miss the wonders around us. There is a beautiful world to enjoy. It can give us joy in times of difficulty. There are beauties in life too, such as other people who love us, people whom we can help & love, children with all their wonder & innocence, and there are all the beauties of the wonderful gospel.

Hidden worlds

The surface of the sea may look smooth and flat, as though it is resting and nothing is happening, but there is always a lot going on inside. There are moving currents which we can’t see. There are living creatures swimming or being born or dying or being eaten, or escaping another hungry creature. Plants grow and move with the currents.

People are like that too. We can’t judge others by their outward appearance. They may look fine, even happy, but everyone goes through trials and hard times, and has problems and unhappinesses, and we aren’t always aware of it. Just as we may enter and swim in a seemingly calm sea, yet be entering a living, moving world, so when we interact with each other, we intrude on someone’s emotions and should tread carefully and be gentle with each other. Let’s not give offence or be hurtful.

It's not how far we go but how long we spend that matters

I usually walk a certain route which I know is a total of 5km and takes me 1 hour. I push my grandson in the pram (stroller), and he weighs nearly 20 kgs, plus there is the weight of the pram and whatever we put in it, like books for him to read & toys for him to play with. So sometimes I get tired towards the end of my walk & walk more slowly.

One day, as I got near the car, I had to walk beyond the car to make up the full 5kms, but I had already walked for an hour. I was very tired and didn’t feel like going the extra bit. As I inwardly debated whether I should make up the 5 kms, this thought came to me: It’s not how long we spend, but how far we go, that matters, and as that thought came into my mind, I realised that it applied equally to scripture study.

 It’s how long we spend in the scriptures, not how far we read, that matters. We may read only a little, but if we study it and ponder and pray about it, that is more important than hurrying through a certain number of pages to make up our daily quota. We may learn more from that kind of reading than if we rush through a lot.

What to do?

One day, after our walk, we spent time at the playpark. There was a terrible smell and I was feeling irritable about it, and not enjoying myself. After some time, I realised – I don’t have to sit here. I can go home, or go somewhere else. How silly of me to take so long to realise that, but I had wanted to allow my grandson time to play there.

I thought how sometimes people watch inappropriate movies or TV because there is nothing else to watch! That is equally "silly". We have the choice of turning it off. If there is nothing else to watch, we don’t have to watch anything. We can read a wonderful book or go for a walk, or have an early night, or we can even spend time with our families. Often, these alternatives are even better than "good" TV shows too!